My grandfather was a deeply religious man, who had one final semester left at the seminary before he met my grandmother and decided that what God really wanted for him was to create a family and a life with the beautiful blonde peasant girl he saw. This is according to my mother and I will…
Category: Adult Cross Culture Kids
Adults who grew up between two cultures and constantly had to switch between their home culture and the culture they were living in, often making compromises between the two. These are our stories, through various lenses.
Road Trip to Silesia IV – on friendship(s) (and) final thoughts
Road Trip to Silesia IV – on friendship(s) (and) final thoughts There is an epilogue to all this, because there always is an epilogue to all this once you’ve come back, decompressed and attained the benefit of hindsight. It helps that you are not dependent on anyone or any circumstance in that particular situation. The…
The Avon Lady is Not The Only One Who Hates Me – a treatise on my relationship with conservative societies
We ran into the Avon Lady again the other day. As always in these cases, I was with her neighbor and – again as always in these cases – we saw her son first. He greeted his neighbor, looked a question at me as though he wasn’t quite sure whether to talk to me or…
More Tales from the Polish Relatives: wujek Marian
The person who did stay in my mind, for a long time, was ciocia Basia’s husband, wujek Marian. Wujek Marian had married into the family (obviously) and when I first met him at the age of eleven I was scared of his dog. As an aside, before I discovered that I’m somewhat of a dog…
Unraveling the Mystery of the Polish Relatives: ciocia Basia
If I held off writing about her it’s (mainly) because she is the one I interacted with the least. She was my mother’s first sister (the third-born) and my mother hated her guts. My mementoes of her were admittedly vague. Apparently we’d first met when I was two and she joined forces with me and…
Unraveling the Mystery of the Polish Relatives: ciocia Magda part I
Ciocia* Magda was my mom’s youngest sister, and I met her (perhaps) properly when I was seven. At least that’s when I remember her properly. Family history says she stayed with us for two years but I can’t say if being seven was the start, the end or fell somewhere in between. I remember a…
Unraveling the Mystery of the Polish Relatives: wujek Zbyszek part II
I realized that he was more typical of the average, well educated Polish male than atypical: acutely aware of his status and how it affected others in full knowledge of the fact that the woman they’d chosen to bear their children would count her blessings of having landed such a fine specimen of a man, keep her mouth firmly shut and do the best to raise and maintain a family unit lest the neighbors, church and assorted acquaintances, relatives and friends get a chance to list all her shortcomings (and by extension also those of her family), a feat that would happen anyway, regardless of how perfect she aimed to be.
Imposed Standards of Beauty
As I came to understand it, beauty in Poland was both a currency and a commodity, and that belief was reinforced pretty much on the daily, in subtle and more hidden ways. It was easier to deal with coming from the Polish women and girls outside the confines of home, because they could be waved away with the excuse that this is just how they were – and as I learned the older I got – not everyone had to be your friend, no matter how seemingly glamorous they were or appeared to be.
Unraveling the Mystery of the Polish Relatives: wujek Zbyszek part I
I probably still have some of my mother’s kin living where she last left them. I wouldn’t know because to me they are not family. In fact they are the furthest thing from family a person would wish to have / would / could wish on their arch enemy / enemies to have. This is…
On Finland
On December 6 Finland – as every year – celebrated its independence from Russia with great fanfare. Not by showcasing massive parades or anything else that would draw mass attention to it. Instead post after post proclaimed the glory of Finland and why the poster – Finnish and foreign – considers Finland the “bestest country…
talesfromyourlocalpubs 